


Broken Promise

by cottonpadenthusiast



Series: The Oneshots [14]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Grief/Mourning, Heavy Angst, Hurt, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-08
Updated: 2019-03-08
Packaged: 2019-11-14 02:00:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 967
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18043304
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cottonpadenthusiast/pseuds/cottonpadenthusiast
Summary: Fic in response to prompt "You promised me- you promised!"





	Broken Promise

“SIRIUS BLACK!” Remus screamed, his throat burning. 

The words echoed around his small living room, the force of it so strong that it blew out the candle sitting beside Remus’ kneeling form. Only the moon’s rays provided any sort of light from the darkness.

Sirius appeared in the doorway. His face was sunken, shallow. His grey eyes landed on Remus.

Remus stood, anger coursing through his veins, hot and heavy and strong. “You promised me- you promised!” He bellowed. 

The room got darker.

“Remus…” Sirius whispered, stepping forward.

“You promised you wouldn’t leave! You fucking promised!” 

“Remus, please-”

Remus took a step closer to Sirius, almost surprised at the sobs that were now racking through his body. “You said you wouldn’t leave again! I can’t lose you again.”

“I’m so sorry, Rem. I’m sorry.”

“Why did you leave me here?” 

Sirius reached for Remus’ hands but Remus pulled away. “I didn’t have a choice, Rem.”

“BUT I’M ALONE NOW!” Remus yelled, the way he had been wanting to for days, the way he had been wanting to scream at Sirius as soon as he had left. No relief came when he saw the guilt flash across Sirius’ face.

Remus fell to the floor.

His quiet, broken sobs filled the room as he rocked back and forth. Sirius kneeled down in front of Remus and a cold hand reached to cup his cheek, a thumb wiping at his tears. Remus felt his soul strain at the touch, the pain slicing through his back, the result of a bargain with dark magic. The spell performed to bring a loved one back from the dead temporarily would have killed most wizards, but he was already a dark creature. Darkness already consumed his soul.

“I didn’t mean for this to happen. I never wanted to leave you, Rem. Never. But we can’t change it. This is the way things are.”

Remus looked up and met Sirius’ eyes. Even in death, Sirius’ eyes were filled with a warmth that Remus could not capture in words. 

“You promised me you wouldn’t leave again. I’ve already lost you before. I can’t lose you again.”

“I’m so sorry. ” Sirius pressed his forehead against Remus’. The familiarity of the action, the memories that exploded in Remus’ mind, made his chest heave. He would never have this again.

He would never have Sirius again.

Pain, heavy and suffocating, weighed itself down on Remus’ heart. He wrapped his arms around Sirius and pushed his head into his shoulder, waiting for the smell of wood and leather, the smell of Sirius, to fill his lungs. It never came.

He had little time left.

Remus pressed his lips against Sirius’ neck. “I can’t live without you. I  _need_  you. I can’t…I can’t survive.”

“You can. You can.” Sirius gripped Remus tighter. “You can live. It will be hard. But you’re so strong, Rem. So strong. You have to live. For Harry. For  _me_.”

Remus lifted his head. Sirius smiled at him sadly, brushing the loose curls from his forehead the way he always had. His fingers traced Remus’ jaw the way they always had. His hands cupped Remus’ cheeks the way they always had.

And then he kissed Remus. In the way he always had.

Sirius’ lips were ice cold against Remus’ warm own and Remus shivered, tugging Sirius closer by his shirt, the same shirt that Remus had watched billow around him as he fell through the Veil. The taste of salty tears laced their kisses and their hands shook as they held each other close.

When Remus pulled back, Sirius was dimmer than before. He only had a few minutes left.

“I love you. I always have.”

Sirius lifted Remus’ hand to his mouth and pressed a kiss to his palm. “I know.”

Remus swallowed. “Say hi to James and Lily from me.”

“They say hello too. James also told me to tell you that you owe him ten galleons.”

“What?”

“Apparently, you made a bet in seventh year that I would either die by falling over something or on my motorcycle. He said falling over, and since I fell into the Veil…”

Remus let out a choked laugh, the first one in days. “I should’ve known you would die by tripping over your own feet. Fucking clumsy idiot.”

“I’m glad both my friends can find some sort of amusement in my death,” Sirius said, grinning as tears rolled down his cheeks.

Remus smiled, his eyes so blurry with tears he could barely make out the outline of Sirius. The soft stroking of Sirius’ thumbs over his knuckles was the only sign that he was still there.

“Moons…”

Remus swallowed. “I know. You have to go.”

Sirius pressed a kiss to Remus’ forehead, lingering there for a few moments. Remus bit his lip, feeling the sharp shattering of his heart.

Sirius stood up, letting his fingers skim over Remus’ hair for a moment, before walking towards the doorway. With each step, Remus felt everything he loved get further and further away.

Sirius stopped, turning his head slightly to meet Remus’ gaze. “You know, I think I’m the luckiest man to have lived because I knew you, Remus Lupin.”

He smiled. Remus would know that smile forever, the soft quirk of Sirius’ lips, the crinkle around his eyes, the slight dimple on his left cheek.

That smile would haunt him. It would follow him for the rest of his life. It would remind him of his best friend, his love, his Sirius.

Remus blinked and Sirius was gone. 

The candle beside Remus relit, the soft flame casting shadows across the room as it danced to its own quiet beat.

The world was completely silent. All was still.

Above, the brightest star glowed just a little brighter than before.


End file.
